A Time to Dream Again

What dreams have you seen come to fruition so far in your life? I sunk in my seat getting asked this question. Had any dreams come true? Did I even feel like I should dream? Honestly, I was struck by disappointment and shame, but what was making me feel this way?

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind,

So that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Romans 12:2IMG_1635

 

This year has been a constant journey of digging through the lies that have entangled my beliefs.

I had formed theories of how other people see me and let them shape my thoughts.

Being an all or nothing kind of girl, when I became a Christian as a teenager I went a complete 180 and ran. I was so outraged by what this Jesus had done that I was enthralled to be able to give my every day for Him because He gave His WHOLE life for me. I couldn’t wait to have ministry be my life. There was just one problem- I let little comments and gestures from others make me believe I was insignificant to the Church.

My only hope was if God would whisper in someone else’s ear a prophetic word of whatever ministry He would have me do. Only no one ever said anything. So it took root in how I believed I fit in the church, and become a way of thought. I wasn’t as good as others and would never be highlighted.

WHAT BULL PUCKY. When did I let fear of man become my gas or break to ministry? When did I lose that flame that I wanted to just pour out all of myself so that the Lord could have the Glory He deserves? He is the one who calls and qualifies, not us.

You know it has been almost my whole ‘Christian life’ now that I was stuck in that mindset. I hated dreaming because I didn’t believe my dreams would happen. I absolutely dreaded events with prophetic words because I would come home so hurt when no one would pick me out and say something to me.

SO the other day I saw the lie for what it was and the Lord totally took it out of me. Literally I felt something being uprooted out of my stomach and parts of my brain felt like they were being reset. It was the weirdest feeling. BUT God.

Do you know I would still have salvation even if He did walk me through this? I cannot even comprehend His love sometimes. He sat and personally met with me because He has SO much for me. He doesn’t want lies to hinder the plans and gifts He has purposed for us. What a good father.

So it is a season to really dream again. Little desires and big purposes, He wants it all for me.

Every time I think of a crazy world altering desire, I am writing it down because I will not set down my hope to pick up the lie of ‘that wouldn’t happen for you.’ And it is actually giving me accountability to press in to Him for what He says about my dreams and to have HOPE. The real question I am challenging myself with now: How big do you really think God is? Are your dreams measuring up to that belief?

“Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1IMG_1732

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